I'm really worried about having enough money to hold on to the life I had before. How can I figure out what I can afford anymore?

When you've experienced a sudden, significant loss it can become tremendously important to keep as much of your life as consistent as possible. You don't want to have to make significant changes in your lifestyle, like selling your house, returning to work if you've lost a spouse or asking your partner to return to your work if you've lost your job and are still in the process of searching. You desperately want to maintain the status quo and the thought of having to make changes can bring up powerful emotions of loss, fear, sadness, anger, helplessness, and even embarrassment. There also may be people in your life who are also struggling-family members, for example, who don't want to face the change either, who don't want to move, or who don't understand why it might be necessary to cut back on spending.

As difficult as it is to think about making changes, the reality is that most likely you've experienced a reduction in income and that you still have regular bills that need to be paid. Life is different now, and you will have to make difficult decisions. It's a necessary part of the grief process. The important thing to remember is that by making important choices now you're working through your loss and taking control of what you can to best care of your family.

So how can you keep the things that are most important? Well, here are a few suggestions: